Brentyn Parkin
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Things to Consider

Things I have learned (often the hard way)

I promise - can change its meaning depending on who  says it?

7/4/2024

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# The Weight of Promises:

​A Celebrant's Perspective
As a celebrant, I have the privilege of witnessing some of the most profound moments in people's lives.

At  funerals where, people say their final goodbye
At vow renewals, people say confirm and commit  lifelong commitment to each other,

In my role, I see the weight and significance these promises carry.

Promises are not made lightly. They are deeply personal, filled with emotion, and carry a sense of sacredness. They are promises that bind, that create a bond meant to withstand the test of time.

However, in my interactions with the world outside of these intimate ceremonies, I often hear the phrase "Don't worry... I promise" thrown around casually.

It's as if the word 'promise' has a different meaning in this context. A promise is often seen as a commitment to perform a task or achieve a goal. But unlike the lifelong commitments I witness as a celebrant, these promises can sometimes feel transient, their permanence questionable. They often depend on circumstances, resources, and, sometimes, political will.

This dichotomy between the world of lifelong commitments and "other promises" is stark. It's like comparing a mountain's steadfastness to the ocean's ebb and flow

Both are powerful in their own right but operate on different principles. As a celebrant, I find this contrast fascinating. It's a reminder that the weight of a promise can vary greatly depending on the context. It's a lesson in the power of words and the importance of the intentions behind them.

So, the next time you hear someone say, "Don't worry... I promise," take a moment to consider what that promise truly means. Is it a commitment as steadfast as a mountain, or is it subject to the changing tides? Regardless, every promise carries weight. As a celebrant, I am reminded of this every day. And it's a reminder I bring with me in every promise I make and witness.
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  • About
    • Blog
    • Social Change
    • Publications, Community Work & Awards
    • Bio
    • Fees
    • Contact
  • Advisory
  • Workshops
    • Workshop Focus
    • Transforming workshop
  • The Keynote and Speaking
  • Community Conversations
  • Life Ceremonies
    • Vow Renewals
    • Naming Ceremonies
    • Funerals & Life Celebrations
    • Weddings
    • Family Celebrations